Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Spring is Here!! and a Snow storm is on the Way!

Seriously... I've been a terrible blogger for the last 3 months. As most of you have read or know otherwise, being pregnant for the 4th time is creating a 'bare minimum' type lifestyle at our home. Unfortunately that means blogging does not make the cut 99% of the time. The remaining 1% of the time I might have time, I'm probably already sleeping, so it doens't happen anyway!!

So -- no pictures up yet from the Winter family ski trip...
No pics from Easter
No pics from Liv's 3rd Birthday party
None from Anika's 7th Birthday party

YET... someday, I promise they will be up!

We did have a great time this last month of April... (wait, the whole month is GONE??) 2 birthdays and a visit from Grandparents and Aunt Carrie Morrison made for a festive "fun" filled month!

Liv has become quite the little lady as she starts her 3rd year. She and I have been going through the adventure of "Growing Kids God's Way" at our churches Mom's Coffee (Bible study). As much as she may NOT appreciate it, it is giving me much better parenting tools... and in many other ways, relax about things that I know she will be able to grow into as long as I have the foundation set right from the beginning. We have a few "areas" we are both working on... One of which is helping train her the appropriate response(s) when she doesnt' like the answer I give her (usually when it's a "no") or when shie is being compelled to do something she really doesn't want to do. As with Anika at this age... there has been LOTS of drama... OH the drama. This is exactly why I said I would never have girl babies (when i was in my late teens and early twenties).

However, having girls is SOOOO much fun in so many other ways, I've just been determined to find healthy ways from them to work through the drama without it being a total burden on everyone else around them.

I have a few (not so fond) memories as a child and having one of my brothers get right down in my face and speak very quietly to me ... as I was having a drama moment of my own I suppose .... He was saying something to the effect that if I started to cry and make a fuss that my mom would hear... and then she would make me go back inside, and I wouldn't be able to stay out and do whatever adventure we were having outside. I recall this occasion very clearly that I REALLY did NOT want to have to go back inside with mom... I'd probably have to do some cleaning or other chores, as it seemed that is all that mom ever did! I was motivated by my desire to have something better... and my (much) older brother wasn't going to put up with a whining, crying 'baby' sister along on his adventure. So... I learned to "suck it up."

Being a mother of two girls now, I've learned a few things about teaching young girls to "suck it up." I do not have the same motivational factor as a mom, that my older brother had on me... perhaps another friend or other person close to my girls could be short and matter-of-fact with them... as a mom, I've had to learn a kinder and gentler approach.

I started early with Anika, getting down on her level, and speaking calmly to her, directing her to take a deep breath. Then I would talk her through whatever seemed to be upsetting her... assuring her we will "figure it out." On other occasions, there is nothing to figure out... she just had to make the choice to be "OK" or even happy about the situtaion that she was not in favor of being OK about... certainly not happy about....

One of the fruits of the Spirit is Self-control - Galatians 5:22-23. It's not about asking my girls to deny true feelings... or to bury situations that should not be ignored... but there are times when they need to obey me, and obeying me includes having a good attitude about what they are being asked to do. (or not do)

So... here is one "funny" to end this diatribe!

The other morning as Liv, Anika and I were snuggleing in bed for a couple of minutes before we got up for breakfast... Anika and Liv had brought thier dolls into my bed ... and Anika was doing a pretend baby cry... telling Liv her baby needed her, because she was crying. This was Liv's response:

Holding baby under the armpits, and speaking calmly, she said "take a deep breath." And that was the end of the situation for Liv... she was ready for breakfast!!